The Delicious Jaime Sandwich

When it comes to the second installment in the Jaime trilogy, I'm a bit more in the dark when it comes to the production of the film.  That's because when filming began in mid-May 2002, I was back over at the Baxter.  My station there was now permanent since fellow manager John Patterson passed away suddenly.  As a result, I didn't learn that a sequel was under way until Jonathan already had about a month and a half of filming done and "in the can" so to speak.   The manager "Col. Jaime Sandwich"
Ian Huff and Jonathan Lyons lament Jaime's death  I didn't learn about the sequel until I showed up at Village one afternoon to catch a movie, saw Jonathan with his camcorder and heard from manager Robert Boston what was going on.  Shortly after, Jonathan saw me and asked me if I wanted a role in the film or not.  I agreed and asked what he had in mind.  He told me that he wanted to do a training film as we had done for "The Distorted Jaime Sandwich" and would like me to be the host of that segment.  I took him up on his offer and even agreed to write the script for that particular section of the film.
Taking on the task of writing the training film was a lot of fun for me.  I looked to the format of old "educational shorts" that were often shown in high schools during the 1940s through 1970s.  You'd have topics on career paths, hygiene, etc. and they'd always be laughably outdated.  So I set the short in the 1950s and decided to make it as politically incorrect and dated as conceivably possible.  It began by giving my film's host the name of Dr. Adolph Von Auschwitz and a Dr. Strangelove-esque German accent to match his Aryan name.  And yes, I am doomed to hell for it.   In the short, I played the politically-incorrect Dr. Adolph Von Auschwitz.
Mr. John Smith wishes never to see "another damn kernel of corn ever as long as I live!" The short was entitled: "Apex Management Training Video 34-C: The Benefits of Corn." It depicts what happens to theatre manager Mr. John Smith (generic name intended) when he wishes he'd never see another kernel of corn again.  One his wish is uttered, Kernel, the Corn Spite (3rd in command of Satan's Army of Hell Imps) appears and takes all corn and corn-based products in the world away.  John Smith is happy at first until the lack of corn leads to his catching mesothelioma from asbestos.  John Smith vomits up blood and becomes repentant, only to be mocked by Kernel and quickly meet with a grisly death.
Jonathan films me upside down to create illusion of bad film splices. Robert Boston played an eerily perfect Mr. John Smith for the short.  Ian Huff, playing the Converted Communist, looks over his lines for the scene.
In writing the script for this segment, I tried to make every line of dialogue ridiculously outdated.  When John Smith is getting mad at having to drag a bag of popcorn seed to the concession stand, he moans, "I can’t wait for 1980 to get here. By then I’ll have robots doing all the work for me."  Dr. Auschwitz professes later that, "[Corn] is one of our nations top industries behind atom-based power and smallpox immunizations...There’s no equal ownership of this particular industry. That would be Communism. And speaking of Communism, nothing helps fight the Reds like a big bowl of corn." Joe Hatfield played the Stalin-loving Communist before introduction of corn into his life.
Coily (top), our inspiration for the Kernel (bottom). Before you even ask, yes we even had Communists in the short.  Joe Hatfield played a great "commie," standing proudly by a picture of Josef Stalin and mocking "the American pig dogs."  Then he gets a serving of corn and he's as American as apple pie.  The Kernel was inspired by a character named Coily, a coil sprite in "A Case of Spring Fever." Similar to this short, a man wishes he'd never see a spring again, gets his wish and regrets it.  However, he's lucky enough to receive redemption unlike our John Smith.  The Kernel's prophecy:  "President Eisenhower’s top executives estimate that in 1987, we will have fully colonized the moon. The extra-oxygen rich atmosphere surrounding it will be ideal for raising huge crops of super-sized space corn. This space corn will enable us to create a super-healthy army of extraordinary magnitude in order to reach and conquer the furthest corners of the universe."
Robert Boston as John Smith reacts in fright to the appearance of the Kernel. Dr. Auschwitz provides no help as John Smith is eaten alive by cancer. "Corn, capitalism and America sure are keen," says a converted Communist.
This would be the full extent of my knowledge of the film's goings-on for the duration of the summer.  While I knew the basic plot (Jaime becomes a manager), I would be in the dark about most of the production until its premiere on August 3rd.  This premiere was more heavily attended than the first. Every Village employee was there, as well as myself, many employee friends and even ex-employees.  I arrived late (about a third in) since I got stuck closing the theatre and couldn't escape.  I would have missed more, but Jonathan showed a "Director's Cut" of the first film before he got the second one rolling.   Jaime takes a call with the company president on his first day of managing
Jaime's resurrection from the dumpster marks the beginning of the second film. Luckily, there was an intermission and I was able to catch up on most of what I'd missed.  Before I go any further, I'll give you the plot breakdown.  It begins with Jonathan and Ian are lamenting Jaime's absence.  They're also now working at the Village Eight (I guess college didn't pay off).  Jaime rises from the dumpster and everyone seems surprised to learn that he's been dead and rotting in a dumpster for over a year.  How'd he come back to life?  Who cares?  It's a sequel and more importantly, it's the Village Eight.  Some things are best left unexplained.  Everyone in the film accepts it so, by God, you should too.
Despite having been fired and a year-long absence, Jaime is taken back on as an employee at Village Eight (just like real life!).  The first portion of the film is similar to the last (as is the usual case with sequels) as Jaime adjusts to new managers and employees.  Then he captures the infamous Pantless Poker and as a result he is promoted to the level of assistant manager.  After that, the rest of the film deals with Jaime struggling to earn the respect of the staff and keep the customers from destroying the theatre. Jaime is promoted after capturing the Pantless Poker (above).
A very drugged-up Robert Boston plays the main authoritative figure. Garrett McGill is a defiant employee who fights Jaime in a broom battle. "I'd make a great manager. Thank you," says a confused Fran Steves.
"I'm so happy!" squeals an overly-perky Anne Hammon as Jaime's pregnant dream wife. I  really enjoyed the sequel.  In fact, I believe it stands out as my favorite in the trilogy for a number of reasons.  The main one being that I didn't see much of the footage in advance, allowing me to enjoy many of the sequences a lot more.  There's a great opening montage of Village shots (Robert laughing in slow motion, the out-of-order change machine, staff getting dressed) tuned to Beethoven's  Symphony No. 5.  There are also some surreal dream sequences with Jaime's hilarious dream wife (Anne Hammon - Jonathan's girlfriend at the time).  She's drenched in makeup, has a basketball shoved under her sweater and says non-sequitur lines like "I work at John E's!" and my favorite: "I'm with child!"
Another fun addition to the cast was short-lived employee Eric Major.  He played a frequent, trouble-making customer who liked to bitch about the theatre being too hot or too cold, the popcorn being too salty, not fresh enough, not hot enough, too buttery, etc.  There's a scene where he trips, a madness bucket of popcorn goes up in the air and a huge shower of popcorn comes raining down.  I have no idea how they rigged it (I think it was a garbage bag full of popcorn attached to the ceiling above), but it was funny as hell.  That and Eric demanding a refund for the arcade games despite the signs stating "No Refunds" was a nice in-joke for everyone.   "I can't read sir!" says Eric Major as a moronic customer who can't see why he can't get what he wants.
"Jaime! Oh, you look hot!" says Molly-moo upon returning. The last bit of the movie involves the return of Molly-moo (Molly Murphy) to the Village Eight theatres.  She sees Jaime and the two fall in love all over again, despite their breakup in the first film.  Jaime proposes to her with a madness bucket ("This has unlimited refills.  Will you marry me?") and she accepts his offer.  There's a bizarre wedding ceremony in theatre #5 with Shannon Warren acting as an ordained priest and reading vows from a butter pump cleaning manual.  The two are married and they happily drive off into the sunset.
Jaime proposes to Molly- moo with a madness bucket, leading to a wedding... assistant manager Craig Miller gives Molly-moo away at the ceremony... and Shannon Warren acts as the pedophilic priest who marries them.
The last shot of the movie is half the cast singing a song entitled, "Oh, Popcorn (carry me home)"  It was actually impressive and a nice way to end the second film.  Everyone who was present loved both of the movies shown.  Since the sequel was so well received, the notion of a third film entered the minds of Jonathan, Jaime and myself. We decided then that work for the next installment needed to begin right away.  Little did we know what we were getting into.  To learn what I mean, click here to continue on to "The Disputed Jaime Sandwich." The cast from the film sings "Oh, Popcorn (carry me home)."

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